Please queue up.

You may think that the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence, but believe me, it takes only a trip to your regional passport office, to think otherwise, and count your blessings, however miserable you may consider your life to be.
Early-morning, a bleary-eyed you, make your way to the scheduled place, and find to your dismay, a sea of humans who have beat you to waking up in the morning, and can be seen milling around, all looking equally grumpy and sleepy.
Fighting an urge to dispel the frown that has slowly spread on your face, you try to plunge into the queue, saving yourslef from sharp elbows, and even sharper tempers of people who are awaiting their turn.
you can hear people whispering in your ears how they can get your passport issued / re-issued with just some extra money.
Blah.
Touts.
Fighting off their whispered advances, you weave your way through the crowd; after that last burst of energy, a good three hours later, you make your way to the blessed counter to take your token from an oily-looking babu.
just when you think that you can finally join the alarmingly-long line outside, post-collecting the token that is, the oily-looking babu looks you over (shudder), gives an orange-grin, and utters the dreaded words, "Problem."
Your face takes on that ashen look; and after hearing his monologue about rules, lawas, and the like, you make your way back glumly; your work undone.
That's what happened to me.
And no, I can't help the scowl.

Who says life is fair?

An endless wait.
My life right now can be summed up in these three words.
Endless calls to various agents(read passport, visa, property dealers) are only doing two things:
a) Alarmingly up my escalating phone bills
b) Make me frown / grimace / sigh in exasperation
Patience is in severely short supply.
Family folks' / colleagues / friends' / well-wishers' words of encouragement are doing nothing to cheer gloomy me.
Add to that, the weather isn't doing much to dispel the lack of cheer all around.
Getting up when the entire world is cosy in their warm quilts is another sob story.
Aaaaaaarg!

Happy Birthday Lars Ulrich

Despite standing a lil' over 5ft 7 in, this avid scuba diver is known more for the waves he makes on stage, thrashing on stage as a drummer par excellence.

Ladies and gentlemen, please put your hands together for Metallica's lead drummer, Lars Ulrich, as he celebrates his birthday today.

Dude, you rock big time.

Happy Birthday.

Keep drumming.

A foggy experience

It seems to be the hottest news since the focus shifted from a certain pouty Hollywood actress, in India with her equally famous hubby, and offspring from all over the world.

Delhi is severely handicapped because of the fog that seems to have got everyone in a fever.

The traffic in the city,famous for its snail-pace, just became slower, thanks to the mist and the fog that has gripped the city.

Fights and trains are affected badly.

Sample this: you miss the piping hot parathas that await you on the breakfast table, just so that you can watch that amply-rounded middle, and more importantly, so that you don't miss your scheduled flight.

An hour later, an empty-stomached you reached your destination - the airport, that surprise surprise looks a wee bit too isolated.

A frown on your face, you steer yourself, baggage in tow, to the counter of your preferred airlines.

A red-lipped, kohl-ed PYT looks up at you, trying to manage her face into a practised smile.

After mouthing the customary salutation, she looks at her brightl-painted talons, and utters the dreaded words, "Your flight is delayed by 4 hours."

You barely hear her apologies for the inconvenience caused, brush past the gentleman who has been peering anxiously from over your shoulder, and collapse on the ice-cold bench nearby. (Cussing words optional)

Frowning, you see the scene around you. Several people are in the same bad mood that you are in.

A young mother is trying to smooth her four-year old son's hair, while at the same time,rocks the infant in her arms.

A couple of girls are sipping coffee and looking all around themselves.

A bored-looking businessman is trying to decided whether to read the financial paper in his hand, or work upon his laptop.

An anxious looking young man keeps checking his expensive-looking wristwatch (probably a Rado).

Another is trying to amuse himself with his phone.

After taking in the entire scene, you manage a weak smile, and decide that a nap is just upyour street.

Now if only you had consumed those parathas...

The week that was

It's been a hellluva week for me.
Long hours, bleary-eyed me has made it through the loooong week...
But I'm not complaining.
I only wish The Prestige would have released this weekend to add some cheer.
Glad for the three-day break through.
God knows I need to put my feet up and let my hair down.
Whew!

Osama dead?

With my mother currently in Assam, an insurgency-ridden state, it is but natural for me to read anything because of which the state is in the news.

Imagine my surprise when I read that Osama bin Laden had been hunted and killed in the state.

Disbelief writ large on my face, I read further.

Apparently a 10-feet tall jumbo also shared its name with the most dreaded and hunted-for man on the face of this earth.

The namesake pachyderm, known for terrorizing the people of Assam for over two years, was killed yesterday in a tea plantation.

Whether it was the same elephant that had caused so many people to live in constant fear, is not completely sure, but the Assam local assembly, which had ordered the killing, is in the line of fire definitely, with several conservationists and animal welfare activists bitterly criticizing the killing.

With India being home to almost half of the dwindling Asian elephant population in the world, this issue will certainly not go down well.

Watch this space for more news.

It happens only in Delhi

In typical Delhi fashion, several youth yesterday at a “happening” discotheque in the city, decided that enough was enough, and they just had to liven up stuff at the large gathering.
So loud, cussing words and oh hell! blows were duly exchanged. Next followed some more colorful vocabulary, introduction of a couple of mean-looking knives, and in the flash of a second, there was blood on the dance floor.
Within a matter of minutes, several well-dressed, so called "elite" people had become thirsty for each other's blood, in an extremely savage manner.
Sleepy-looking policemen made an entry on the scene, muttering loudly, wielding their lathis.
And all the people who had come out for a night of dancing and fun, were hastily asked to make their way to their respective homes. Or risked being dragged for a long, cold night at the nearest lock-up.
Loud, beer-bellied people exchanged scowls, and started off on their “Do-you-know-who-I-am” jazz.
It was a painful sight to see people running helter-skelter, looking out for friends who seemed to have been left behind in the crowd, or worse, embroiled in the fight.
My friends and I also beat a hasty retreat to the 24-hour-open-food-joint run by the Indian Railways.
Bleary-eyed, when we all finally returned to our respective homes, we just had one thought – why do some people have to spoil everyone’s fun.
And I have seen that such stuff usually happen in the capital city of our country.
What a shame!

New UN Secretary-General

Like many other Indians, I too was disappointed that Shashi Tharoor would not be the next UN General-Secretary after Kofi Annan.
The eighth UN Secretary-General will now be South Korean Ban Ki-moon.
Though already sworn-in today, the septuagenarian diplomat will only assume his new responsibility on January 1, 2007, when Kofi Annan steps down.
Good luck to him.

The Big Fat Indian Wedding

There are officially, a lot of “knotty” people out there.

While the rest of India puts freezing toes into hot-as-toast quilts, Delhi(and many other places) are gearing up for a long season of weddings.

I heard that this Monday, Delhi alone, had over 36,000 weddings. Whew!

Not to be left behind , yesterday had quite a few thousand lined up too.

Threading our way through traffic last night, it didn’t help us at al that there were several thousands of people on the road, bravely bearing the bitter cold, out to attend some wedding or the other.

A column in the national daily, perhaps because of lack of other newsy articles, reported how poor, “overworked,” politicos had an average of 12 weddings to attend every other night.

Sample this hypothetical situ: Secretary of a politician at a press meet, “Sir had to attend Mr. so-and-so’s brother-in-law’s son’s wedding last night. He is dog tired after all that revelry. So kindly excuse his political gaffes / howlers today.”
Wow!

So last night, on our way back from West Delhi (where we had gone to see a house for best friend who is to get married next month), we saw loads of Delhiite baraatis, out in all their gaudy finery, bejeweled hands raised in typical marriage dance style, swaying to the loud tunes that the local bands belted out.

Grooms sat on pretty white mares. Most looked unmistakably forlorn (was it because of the cold or the fact that they were abandoning their single status for a lifetime of in-laws, groceries, kids? lol)

Kids looked as if they were having the time of their lives, dancing, prancing, yelling gleefully, some so enthused that they were shrieking like banshees.
Despite the car windows rolled up, we could scarcely hear a word of what we were spouting; the deafening cymbals drowning any attempt at conversation with their deafening sound.

Is that what they call music?

I guess even the Bard, William Shakespeare, would think twice before saying again, “If music be the food of love, play on..”

Needless to say, my ears hurt till late last night.

And earaches suck big time.

Owwwwwww

And to think I have to attend quite a few nuptials in the coming few months.
Thank God for the awesome food they serve there, though.

Quite a saving grace. Burp.

And now, Dictionary.com's 2006 Word of the Year: call for entries

Trotting on the heels of Merriam-Webster's search for(and selection of) Word of the Year 2006(the winner was truthiness), Dictionary.com, the free online dictionary search website, is also calling everyone to cast their votes for the 2006 Word of the Year.

Cast your vote here.

I've already cast mine.

Polls open till tomorrow.

Results will be announced on December 18, 2006.

A 12-year old association hits the dust.

Celebrated duo, Mahesh Bhupathi and Leander Paes, nicknamed The Indian Express, have officially called their 12-year old association quits.

The ace pair, which has won multiple Grand Slams, added another feather to their caps after winning the Asian Games Gold in the tennis doubles at Doha yesterday.

But instead of uncorking the champagne and waxing eloquent about each other after the tournament, they preferred to wash each other’s dirty linen in public, and have sworn not to team up again on the marquee.

Though stories of their drifting apart had been doing the rounds for quite some time now, the duo officially called-off their partnership yesterday. As if there weren't enough bad things in the world. Sigh.

If I had my way, I would get the two guys to unwind with each other at a chic lounge, and talk it over.

After all, they look better dueling it out with opponents on lush-green tennis courts than with each other, don’t they?

Most popular websites

In a survey conducted recently, the results of which were declared, the following are the most popular websites. See which ones you already frequent, and check out the ones you haven't till now, like I did.

1. Apple Movie Trailers: Apple's official Quicktime Movie Trailer page with the newest and preview release trailers.

2. Blogger: weblog publishing system owned by Google since 2003.

3. Craiglist: centralized network of online urban communities, featuring free classified advertisements and forums sorted by various topics.

4. Drudge Report: popular U.S.-based news website run by Matt Drudge. The site consists primarily of links to stories from the US and international mainstream media about politics, entertainment, and various current events as well as links to many popular columnists.

5. Factcheck: monitors the factual accuracy of what is said by major US political players in the form of TV ads, debates, speeches, interviews, and news releases.

6. Flickr: photo sharing website and web services suite, and an online community platform.

7. HowStuffWorks: website dedicated to explaining the way many things work.

8. Lifehacker: advertising-supported weblog about life hacks and software; covers Microsoft Windows, Mac and Linux programs as well as time-saving tips and tricks.

9. Museum of Modern Art: provides information on current and upcoming art, film and media, and online exhibitions.

10. Netflix: largest online DVD rental service, offering flat rate rental-by-mail to customers in the United States.

11. National Public Radio: internationally acclaimed producer and distributor of noncommercial news, talk, and entertainment programming.

12. Rotten Tomatoes: reviews and previews of movies, videos, DVDs, and video games from print, online, and broadcast critics.

13. Shopzilla: buy the best products at the lowest prices by using Shopzilla, the shopping search engine with smart price comparison and intelligent professional reviews.

14. The Onion: America’s most loved parody newspaper, published weekly in print and online.

15. Technorati: searches weblogs by keyword and for links. Also provides news from general news services and blogs.

16. Television Without Pity: website that provides detailed recaps of certain television dramas and reality TV shows, often by mocking them, as well as forums in which members can discuss a myriad of television related topics.

17. The Smoking Gun: large collection of public documents on crimes, celebrities, politicians, and the FBI.

18. Internet Movie Database: online database of information about actors, films, television shows, television stars, video games and production crew personnel.

19. Zappos.com: the Web’s most popular shoe store.

Edvard Munch and The Scream

Was slightly taken aback today when I opened the Google home page.
A tormented limp figure, hands tightly clasping ears, stared up at me ominously, looking as if it were just about to come out with a blood-curdling scream / howl.
Visibly shaken by the image, I set about to figure out the reason behind the wailing figure.
Turns out, today is Norwegian painter, Edvard Munch’s birthday. Now I am no connoisseur of art, so kindly ignore my “howler.” The picture is one of his most famous, aptly named, The Scream. Though I was aware of a painting by that name, I had never seen it before; hence my surprise and why-in-the-world-did-Google-keep-this-image-more-than-a-month-after-Halloween bewilderment.
Turn to the Google homepage to see it for yourself.
Or if it is after December 11 that you see this post, then see it right here.

Ode to a little princess

She rushes back from school
Her excited face no one can fool
She heads straight for her mom’s cozy lap
Chatters endlessly, doesn't want a nap.

The mother bestows upon her a doting smile
As she hurriedly updates that last file
Before she can set the table for two
With a spread that would make her daughter coo.

Mysorepak, Murruku, rasam, sambhar, chutney and rice
Make the pony-tailed girl grin and get up in a trice
Gleefully she flings her satchel, makes her way to the table
The idyllic setting is akin to many a happy family fable.

“Oh oh,” between mouthfuls, the lass pipes up in good cheer
Pointing at the laptop which is sitting near
The mother needs no second hint and smiles
Starting to go through her e-mails, of which there are piles.

She then comes to the parts that her daughter would like to study
Sent by her mother’s friend, who is now like a close buddy
With sparkling eyes and a beam, the girl toils through the words
Exclaiming, laughing, sounding like the chirping of a lot many birds.

After the twenty-minute-something happy lunch and reading session
It’s time for the girl to read up on her exam lesson
Thoughts of dance, e-mails, and blogs banished, she studies, her head low
Waiting for the next day’s lunch when she would have a repeat show.

(Dedicated to dear Mahithi. Good luck for your exams, sweetie. Do well. And make your Mummy proud)

Stopping By Woods On A Snowy Evening - Robert Frost

The poem below by Robert Frost is a personal favorite. I guess most people identify strongly with its concluding four lines. It is said that even Pandit Jawaharlal Nehru was partial to this ode, so much so that he always kept a copy on his desk, and saw it first thing in the morning.

Stopping By Woods On A Snowy Evening

Whose woods these are I think I know.
His house is in the village though;
He will not see me stopping here
To watch his woods fill up with snow.

My little horse must think it queer
To stop without a farmhouse near
Between the woods and frozen lake
The darkest evening of the year.

He gives his harness bells a shake
To ask if there is some mistake.
The only other sound's the sweep
Of easy wind and downy flake.

The woods are lovely, dark and deep.
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep.

- Robert Frost (1874 - 1963)

Merriam-Webster's 2006 Word of the Year

The verdict is finally out.
Merriam-Webster’s, which had asked everyone to submit their nominations for the Word of the Year 2006, have announced the clear winner.
The # 1 Word of the Year for 2006 is truthiness (noun)
Meanings:
a) "Truth that comes from the gut, not books" (Stephen Colbert, Comedy Central's "The Colbert Report," October 2005)
b) "The quality of preferring concepts or facts one wishes to be true, rather than concepts or facts known to be true" (American Dialect Society, January 2006)
The others words that made it to the top ten list were (in order):
2. Google
3. Decider
4. War
5. Insurgent
6. Terrorism
7. Vendetta
8. Sectarian
9. Quagmire
10. Corruption

FYI:
The word that I had nominated made its presence felt worldwide as also made it to the # 10 spot on the list.

A woman's poem

A friend forwarded this to me some minutes ago; my hands were itching to post this poem here.
So here it is:

A Woman's Poem

He didn't like the curry
And he didn't like my cake.
He said my biscuits were too hard...
Not like his mother used to make.

I didn't prepare the coffee right
He didn't like the stew,
I didn't mend his socks
The way his mother used to do.

I pondered for an answer
I was looking for a clue.
Isn’t there anything I could do
To match his mothers shoe

Then I smiled as I saw light
One thing I could definitely do
I turned around and slapped him tight...

Like his mother used to!!!!!

Who says it's a dog's life?

As if there weren't enough stories about a certain blonde hotel heiress “callously” trading-in her fave chihuahua, Tinkerbell (no relation to the namesake fairy from J.M. Barrie's Peter Pan) for a smaller one, Bambi, here comes another mutt out for its fifteen seconds(or make that 8 mm film) of fame.

The Scottish terrier in question is no ordinary pooch, but the First Dog, no less. Ladies and gentlemen, please put your hands together for Barney, the much adored (and petted) pet of U.S. President, George W. Bush.

If the applause has died down, let me reiterate that this canine has now officially joined the likes of dogs (pardon the lowly word) owned by celebs (read Paris Hilton, Nicole Ritchie, Gwen Stefani, Hillary Duff, Sienna Miller, Jake Gyllenhaal, Mischa Barton, Scarlett Johannson, Christina Aguilera, Jessica Simpson, and Joss Stone). Whew! No small feat this. Read the complete article on celeb dogs here.

Coming back to Barney, who has his own blog (boww, oops, I meant wow), and who has been featured with his equally famous sister, Miss Beazley (no, no, not the awful cook from Archie Comics) in many films made by the White House Staff, is back with his latest film, Barney's Holiday Extravaganza.

From playing with golf balls and horseshoes, to hob-nobbing with the who’s-who of the world, to being the center of attraction at the White House annual Christmas parties, this doggie sure has all the fun.

Wuff wuff!

Some random thoughts

- Cloudy skies have delayed the launch of NASA's space shuttle, Discovery. The shuttle, scheduled to carry the seven-member crew (including our very own Sunita Williams) on the night of December 7, 2006, will now be launched on December 9, 2006, at 8:47 p.m.

- Best friend’s engagement tomorrow night. I am all set to shine, shimmer, dazzle, swirl.

- My plans of watching Hugh Jackman this Sunday in The Prestige have all been dashed; the movie’s not released in the country today. (Sob). There go all my plans of watching Batman and Wolverine zap each other. Two other movies have released though:

1. The Guardian: I’m loath to shell out 160 bucks to watch Demi Moore’s toy boy, Ashton Kutcher, and a USCG rescue swimmer, Kevin Costner, the latter who I'd rather see in roles as Robin Hood, Prince of Thieves (remember Bryan Adam’s Everything I do, I do it for you) or as Whitney Houton's protector in The Bodyguard.

2. The saccharine sweet Baabul: Do I even need to answer this one?

- Now had it been Mumble, the adorable tap-dancing penguin in Happy Feet, I wouldn’t have thought twice before getting tickets.

- So this Sunday, what will it be?
In one word – Shopping!

Happy me!

He was the Lizard King. He could do anything

Despite his death 25 years ago, Jim Morrison, a.k.a. The Lizard King / Mr. Mojo Risin, the enigmatic front man of The Doors is still remembered for his bristling energy, “spontaneous” stage shows, and for belting out unforgettable numbers like Hello, I Love You, Touch Me, Strange Days, L.A. Woman, Morrison Hotel, and that cult position number 1 chartbuster, Light My Fire.

On his birthday today, the enigmatic, improvising Morrison would have been proud to see that he lives on, in the minds of his fans, who saw him beyond his troubled years, bohemian lifestyle, stormy affairs, penchant for heroin (an overdose of which caused his death on that fateful third day in July, 1971).

They saw the man for who he was—the man who broke new ground in rock music, with his surrealistic lyrics and sonorous baritone, crooning his way through the tensions of that time.

See the video for Light My Fire here: