Agreed that there is probably no better pleasure in scratching that part of your body which is itching like crazy (next perhaps only to releasing your full bladder).
Which probably explains why so many people can be seen holding a magazine over their ahem…and getting down to business. You also have the ones who refuse to take ‘refuge’ behind the pages of some glossy, and scratch furiously in full sight of everyone who chances to look their way. And by the time you get that much-perfected disdainful expression on your face, you see that after their Michael Jackson crotch-holding impersonation, they bring up their fingers to sniff at them, or worse – delve into a frankfurter.
Of course we all suffer from the – ‘Have-an-itch-will-scratch’ syndrome. The degree and subtlety of the action differs from person to person. It would be a generalisation to say that all men do it (I have seen enough women scratching their cameltoes in my life).
But there are those who scratch as f there’s no tomorrow. If you were to hand them a back loofah, they would probably cast you a look of pure venom, and proceed to do the deed with their claws / nails / talons – what you will. The sound is agonizingly annoying.
It’s not like chalk scratching upon the classroom blackboard.
It’s not like the sound when a DJ moves a vinyl record back and forth over a turntable.
It’s not even faintly like the sound which a hooligan makes while scratching someone’s car by taking a key around it.
It’s not like the scratching sound made by a mongrel who is offering from an acute case of ticks / lice.
It’s not even like the sound made by the 10-year old girl scratching her head, and making the dry skin / dandruff fall off in flakes.
Neither is it like the scratching sound which you make while you are hurriedly jotting the number of the insurance agent.
It’s not like the sound made by your filer over your nails in a D-I-Y session.
It’s not like the sound when you push the brake pedal all the way down.
It’s worse!
Scratch-scratch-scratch-scratch – they go vigorously! Making you cringe, and almost making your hands go up by themselves to cup your ears.
Agreed we descended from apes – must we ape them so in this regard too?
Then perhaps, we should also go Ga-Ga over bananas, swing from branches, and bare our teeth at the very thought of shinning an orange tree...?
3 comments:
now i m dying to know who inspired this post... infact in an introspection mode... plus trying to decide which is worse scratching or digging..
Uhmmm, tuff choice.
They both make me go 'Ewwwww!'
Methinks that random scratching (excluding in the lower-central-body part area, and minus the sniffing-fingers-bit) is perhaps a notch or two more tolerable than exploring the nose for hidden treasure.
Equally nauseating is when people drill into their ears with fingers / pens / keys and then inspect what booty they unearthed. D-I-S-G-U-S-T-I-N-G!
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