Friday, January 22, 2010

Of chipped cups and manky mugs...


It's a grey, wintry day.

The sun has decided to go into hibernation behind the gloomy clouds.

And the steaming cup of hazelnut cappucino looks up at me invitingly, the aroma of greshly ground coffee beans wafting towards my happy nose.

I cup my hands around it, taking in its warmth, and then with one hand, lift it towards my soon-to-be-gratified mouth.


This is where I freeze, purse my lips, and glower at the frothing coffee.

Hubby dearest takes one look, senses what’s happening, and hands me his own cup.

I nod at him in silent gratitude. A quick examination and I take a sip. It wasn’t hazelnut, but I’d make-do with it.

That’s what chipped cups and crockery do to me – they make me break out into my surly-frown-pursed-lips routine.

For many people, crockery should be just functional. What is a mere chip or a crack here and there. Not to me. I’ve walked up in many a restaurant to get my chipped cup / plate exchanged for a non-chipped one. I’ve been known to squirm in my seat at people’s places – and asked them if they could possibly change my cup. Sometime, I’ve just made an excuse to drinking from one.

Some people keep chipped crockery at bay – ‘cos the chips can harbor bacteria. I keep those darn chipped items at bay – because I can’t stand the sight of them. I anyway don’t mind the odd germs, and am all for growing our immunity. Just give me an intact mug, and avoid making me go off my rocker. They look ugly with a capital ‘U.’ They can cut your lip. They look manky. Do you need more reasons? I don’t think so...

My bro, who’s more interested in whether the food’s cooked properly rather than a chip in the plate, calls me dotty. So does hubby dearest. They’ve both got their reasons, I’ve got mine. Fair and square...

Call me wasteful. Call me queer – if I had my way, I’d drop all chipped crockery into the nearest landfill.

Or probably smash them into smithereens... And clap my hands gleefully...

And maybe, just maybe, I should start carrying my favorite mauve cup around. And earn more nicknames for myself like the weirdo who whips-out a mug from her bag !

Thursday, January 14, 2010

Scenes from winter


Another freezing day set in.

While some drizzle the previous day had fueled thoughts about the fog clearing out and biting cold taking a beating, such thoughts couldn’t be more far from what lay ahead.

People, who would rub their hands only when it was accompanied by chuckles of pure glee, looked the exact opposite – glumly staring ahead,shivering despite the expensive woollens that adorned their shoulders, rubbing ther hands to restore some warmth to them.

Easier said than done!

Early office morning goers, their teeth chattering, send up silent prayers for the sun to the skies yonder. Sorely missing the weekends, when they could afford to slink deeper into the cosy warmth of their thick blankets, they curse the week for having begun. Some solace appeared in form of cups with piping hot tea that they stopped for at a roadside shack. What would have otherwise been a three-minute affair with the styrofoam cup has instead been relegated to an under-a-minute condensed form – thanks to the numbing cold which made even a steaming cup into its lukewarm version.

The young executive looks out smugly from the brand new pair of wheels he’s recently bought, admiring the anti-dazzle lights he’d had the good sense to get installed. Cutting through the fog seemed so much easy. The sound system played his favorite track from an ‘80s flick, and he increased both the volume as well as the automobile’s heating with one fluid stroke.

The two labourers shuffle towards their daily-wage earning area – the Metro construction, wrapping their hole-ridden shawls tightly around themselves. Thank God the sheer physicality of their work ensured that they wouldn’t remain cold much longer.

The newspaper vendor, eyes streaming with the cold, flings the correct newspapers into their intended readers’ homes. Cycling bored him, and to keep himself company he whistles loudly. As he turned a corner, he muttered an oath when an aged poodle barked shrilly upon seeng him.

The salesman, after staring long and hard at his weekly target, walks slowly to his motorcycle. Despite repeated kicks, it refused to start. Vigorous shaking of the bike ensued, and the engine then throbbed to life. Remembering to wear the heavy helmet, he sped off in a trail of dust, having forgotten his neatly foil-wrapped lunch – yet again.

The housewife pulls her warm dressing gown closer to herself, and walks out onto the balcony – to wave fondly to her husband who would drive twenty kilometers away to his workplace.

The 40-something CEO steps inside his spacious beauty on wheels. No words of gratitude escape his lips, as his smiling chauffeur closes the Merc’s door upon him. Oblivious to the cold around him, he settles into the leather seat, burying his nose into the day’s market figures. Not once does he look up from his treasure.

The retired gentleman decides to skip his morning walk, and instead talks animatedly to his grand-daughter, who has decided that winters were the best time for her to begin walking, and is on all fours on the tiled floor.

And far from it all - a lone dog looks longingly inside a warm coffee shop, hoping against hope that some kind soul would perhaps throw him the last piece of his morning sandwich...

Wednesday, January 06, 2010

Workstations and those who 'work' them around


While the verdict is yet to be decided by corporates as to whether employees decorating their workstations is a good or a not-so-good idea, many an employee does decorate, or pardon me, upgrade his workstation, so that dusty Dilli becomes some cool Caribben island – thanks to the aqua recycled wrapping sheet that abounds near him.

So while you have a Mister who prefers to line up his awards and honors – yep all 18 of ‘em right next to his laptop, there could also be the holiday junkie who insists the entire team sees her last trip to the Bahamas – through the countless pictures that dot her display board. If that isn’t distracting enough, she ensures anyone who is two arms away from her monitor does not feel left out – what with the blinking, rapidly-changing screensavers that show her in all types of (unflattering) clothes. Tres chic can totally take a hike, thank you very much! There are also the zillion images of her nieces and nephews, her canine pet, her human pet (sheesh), you name it…

They don’t call this dude’s workstation a temple for nothing – new employees have been known to stop to pay their tribute to the Gods that reside there and wait for the daily prasadam, until they figure out that the temple is a mile away.You can’t blame the new joinee – you’d stop and look closely too – scratching your head, when you find that all those idols and images of deities that belonged to a temple, were housed in his workstation. At least the incense stays unlit, in the packet – thank God for small mercies.

Then there’s the girl who drinks gallons of water and makes regular trips to
a) fill her bottle(s) of water
and
b) take a leak

She also insists that you keep a marked bottle near you, so as to gauge whether you’ve drank enough water throughout the day. While she glugs water faithfully, you wonder if she should perhaps keep a goldfish in all that water. Would be a nice touch indeed! Except that her daily monotone about how one should consume enough water throughout the day will cause the fish to get swollen bellies…

This guy’s middle name is nico-menthol-caffeine. Two coffee mugs, a pack of cigarettes, a lighter, a matchbox (for safety measure), some mints and a couple of throat lozenges decorate his workstation. A safety hazard is the first term that comes to your mind when you cross his workstation. It’s a wonder the water sprnkler doesn’t drench him from above…

Another chap’s workstation looks straight out of the ‘pages’ of a stationery shop – pens, highlighters, staplers and their pins, thumb tacks, colored post-its – you name it – it’s sitting prettily on his desk. It’s a wonder he manages to find something below that pile.

Then there is the ‘stressed’ guy – what else can explain the array of stress balls, foam rubber stress relievers, and both metallic and neon colored helical coil springs that lie scattered around his desk. I can imagine the conversation trail that could follow when his office extension phone rings:
Stressed guy: Allo
X – Hey, how goes it?
Stressed guy: Not really a great day. Just squeezing my balls.
X – Erm,, gotta go. Bye!

Hasn’t the guy heard of beer? And if that’s a little out of place in an office envronment, maybe he should try chocolate. Works every time, doesn’t it?

There are also the ones whose chocolate wrappers envelope their workstation. Munch-Munch-Munch-they go like pine sawyers. There is the girl who swears by all things organic - jute boxes, some potpourri, green notepads, a khadi bag - all lie strewn around where she works. There is also the guy who has calendars galore – one from the NGO he supports, one a personalised one, one with a deity, one with a so-called holy man’s image atop, and another from a random greeting cards giant. One calendar is enough for most – but not for him. For others like me, the calendar on my phone is more than enough. Thank you very much!

Others also find their way on this list – the guy who hero-worships any death / goth / hard rock band. Bizarre pictures of pink-haired punks with panda eyes, air strumming, attired in what can only be termed a designer’s nightmare (read ripped jeans, stringy tees), adorn this guy’s workstation. Any moment, you expect throbbing drum strains to reach your ears. The Fen Shui expert is another model sample – the laughing Buddha looks you over, ‘lucky’ animals – a dragon, a money frog, a tortoise and a pair of lions – are parked near her seat, as is a ‘lucky’ bamboo, some pieces of pointed crystal, and what looks like an ancient coin. Too bad she forgot the wind chimes at home!

Lastly, there is the girl who takes her being blessed with green fingers theory a step further. It’s difficult for you to spot her petite self behind all that flora – a potted bonsai, a cactus, and a mini-shrub with a blooming damask rose. What’s gonna be next – people flocking to see her garden instead of the President’s?

As for me – some sheets of paper, a pen that writes intermittently, and a dog-eared notepad are all that site near me at the workplace.

What about you?

Friday, January 01, 2010

A Brand New Year


The New Year set upon us today – a cold, foggy morning. While TOOMA and I spent much of the morning doing what we do best – catching up on our respective beauty sleep, the rest of the world embraced the spanking new 2010 shiveringly, a song and a smile set upon their lips, fingers deftly texting messages – some forwarded, some their own creation, while phones – that most definitive of technologies – were reached out for to connect with loved ones.

As the clock struck midnight, many other couples ushered in 2010 with us at the swanky lounge – with the due amount of ‘spirit’ and gusto the occasion demanded. The crystal ball gleamed in the psychedelic lights as the resident DJ, in his booming voice, announced a brand new year.

The year ahead looks bright. Markets look optimistic about completely erasing memories of the two worst economic years of all times. Newspapers herald a series of people-to-people cross-border cultural interactions between two sworn enemy nations. The Auto-Expo ‘roars’ to life in another 4 days in Delhi, while the Commonwealth games will be upon us in another 10 months. FIFA World Cup will get ‘kick’-started. Probably all those top-level meetings by global leaders would make some headway in the field of climate change, and also take a sterner stand against the ugly face of terrorism. Sex and the City - the movie, comes out with a sequel, much to the delight of deliriously-happy women like me, and set the cash registers ringing for fashion brands worldwide. Michael Schumacher also looks set to make the king of all comebacks. The Apple tablet and the Xbox Project Nato will be released – gadget-lovers rejoice!

Quite a few things to mull over. Things look good for sure.

And on that optimistic note, I wish you a year of peace, contentment, joy and prosperity. God Bless!